My most current update sans the wine of my last post (I
hope).
In the coming weeks I plan to get my fistula created. A fistula is a far more permanent method of
receiving dialysis – a vascular access created using my own vein & artery
in my non-dominant arm. I’ve resisted
having a fistula for as long as I’ve needed to think about dialysis. Since finding out that getting a fistula was
my only option I’ve made an effort to face the music with a positive attitude
and well-educated. For the latter I
decided to go straight to the source – whom better to give me the full 411 then
actual patients – and it just so happens I have no short supply of such
persons. The first morning of my
investigative inquiry I met an upbeat, perky gal. I was quite optimistic as I introduced myself
– I mean anyone who could be perky after a 4am chair time and hours of hemo
dialysi must have great things to say about their fistula. I launched in, asking my burning questions – ‘
does it hurt when the needles go in’ and
‘ is it painful throughout the therapy’.
I was certain she would set my mind to ease…. I was wrong.
My first clue should have been her hesitation – but well, I
don’t pick up on body language like I once did.
‘I don’t want to lie to you,’ she says.
Verbal clues I usually get… I
urged her to be completely honest.
Whoever coined the phrase ‘Honesty is the best policy’ never had to have
a fistula created.
I’ll give her points for relaying the info with a positive
perky cadence – she assures me its painful – ‘ sometimes I even scream when
they stick me’ – It is at this point that I am wishing for my ignorance of five
minutes ago, which I decide really was bliss.
I was later reassured that this patient wasn’t the one to
talk to – Uh, yeah, she makes a hard sell… already figured that out – I’m still
not totally sure if she’s not the one to talk to because her experiences are
not the usual patient experience, or if its just that her salesmanship needs
work… A well meaning nurse made further
attempts to set my mind at ease – telling me that after a few weeks they would
stop using sharp needles for access and start using dull needles. In my experience, it’s the dull knife cut
that hurts far worse than the sharp knife!
Suffice to say, my new-found
knowledge might be power, but its appeal is lacking. So in an effort to find the positive I made a
Top Ten list – Perks of Having a Fistula.
10. A fistula is far
less likely of getting infected than an IJ catheter.
9. A fistula is the gold-standard of Hemo dialysis.
8. A fistula presents fewer potential complications than an
IJ catheter.
7. A fistula is a
long-term option for dialysis.
6. According to my venous mapping, I have good vessels in my
non-dominant arm.
5. Battle scars are hot, right? And I’ve earned every one of mine!
4. Fistulas are created under anesthesia.
3. I have really good ‘nurses’ (aka parents) to take care of me!
2. A fistula presents a massive target for future blood
draws.
1. I can go swimming & take baths again!!!
I’m still not super excited, but it sure beats the
alternative, and God has been good to bring me to a place of acceptance. Please pray for my attitude to be pleasing to
God and that I will be sensitive to His promptings and the lessons He would
have me learn through this. Please pray
also that I would be brave, for I am am a little scared about the unknown (and
newly known). Thanks!
~V
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